Friday, November 23, 2012

Whoever said patience is a virtue, I want to hurt him



There are a lot of things that I don’t like; sushi, spiders, losing at ANYTHING, super sudoku’s, putting/water hazards.  But the one thing I’d have to put right up there at the top of the list is waiting.  I really, really don’t like to wait.  If there’s something I want then I want it now.  I ordered a cable for my car so that I can play my ipod as I drive and it’s not here yet and it’s driving me crazy.  If the person in front of me doesn’t go when the light turns green then you might hear me say, “Come on, what are you doing, let’s go!!”  If I’m on the tee box and someone is taking their sweet time taking their second shot, I get restless. Thinking big picture though, I think I know what I would like to do with my life and I know that it is a process to get there but dang it, I WANT IT NOW!   Foreign mission work is where my passion is at for many different reasons.  I like to travel, I like experiencing other cultures, I like meeting different kinds of people, and of course a desire to share Christ’s message with those who haven’t heard it, meet the needs of people who are struggling to survive, and learn lessons of faith, trust and belief from those who have every reason in the world to throw in the towel.  But I think God gave me some of those likes or interest so that I’ll be willing to go.  I think those are things God has placed in me in order to lead me to the place He wants me.  It’s hard to take someone who doesn’t want to leave home and send them out into the world to spread the word of Christ (although it’s not impossible, at least not for God.  I think Moses gave a pretty good argument as to why God shouldn’t choose him but God wasn’t going to take no for an answer).  But anyways, I think God has given me these interests and desires so that when He comes calling for me to go, it won’t take much convincing.  The problem I have with that last statement is the word ‘when’, when God comes calling.  Remember I said I don’t like to wait.  Spending my summers in Honduras makes me want to go back as soon as I get home and stay forever but like I said, I think it’s a process.  God has his own timetable and I understand that but it doesn’t make it easier.  I can even look back and see how this process has unfolded through things that have happened in the past and are leading me to where I want to go, notice I didn’t say where God wants me to go, we’ll get to that in a second.  I even woke up this morning and thought about how great it would be to go build a house out in Mololoa or even on rock mountain in Santa Ana.  I want to go and I want to go now but I can’t and I HATE IT!  And the hard part, I hope you follow me on this, is that I could easily go but I can’t.  I could get on a plane and go share the great news of Christ with others, build houses, feed the hungry but God’s timing isn’t my timing.  I’ve looked at different mission organizations and different places around the world where I could be a part of a short term mission but long term is different, it’s a process (or so I keep telling myself).  I want to go, it’s easy to go but I can’t because I don’t think God is quite ready to send me.  God is still preparing me and it’s easy to see that I’m not ready just by my impatience.  I can see things that He is working on in me, and then there are things that I can’t see but either way, as much as I want to go, I don’t think I’m completely ready but all I can think about is how much I want to go.  One thing that helps me keep my sanity is knowing that many others have had to wait too.  God provides a great example.  Remember Joseph?  That guy who was 2nd in command of Egypt, who was the head of Potiphar’s household?  Well that same guy that spent at least 2 and as many as 13 YEARS in captivity before becoming 2nd in command.  You don’t think he got a little impatient sitting in jail all that time.  There is even a verse where he tells the cupbearer to remember him after he is freed.  You don’t think he wanted out and wanted to go back to his home land?  He was ready to get out and was trying to find a way out but God said, “Hey, not so fast”.  He still had a plan for him and a reason for keeping him in jail.  Joseph had moments when he wondered what God was doing just as I have but we have to remember it’s a process, this is God’s time frame not ours.  God was still with Joseph even though Joseph wasn’t where he wanted to be.  God had a plan and a reason and we have to remember that.  There may have been moments when Joseph doubted the overall plan, times when he was impatient with God and questioned why he was still in jail but the fact is, he stayed true and faithful to God.  Joseph wanted out and he even put his trust in the cupbearer to help him but we see how well that worked out, the cupbearer forgot about him.  Another thing we have to remember is when we put our faith and trust in God, He may have a direction for our lives that we aren’t anticipating.  Joseph thought he was going to be in charge of Potiphar’s house for a while and then all of a sudden bam, he’s in jail.  God had a reason and a plan.  For me it’s easy to envision the plan I want.  The problem is that it may not be Gods plan.  Joseph didn’t want to be in jail, I would assume, just like I don’t want to keep going to this boring job and school every day (although he probably wanted out of jail much more than I want to be out of school) but we have to remember that God is the author of this story not us.  Remember I said I can see how God is leading me to where I want to go?  Well maybe that place isn’t where God wants me and I’ve got to understand that.  I have to realize that maybe I can see God taking me one place when in reality He is taking somewhere completely different.  I have to wait until He is ready to put me where He wants me, but it’s so hard to wait.  God is the author and when we try to take the pen into our own hands we usually screw something up.  That’s one place patience comes into play.  We have let God write the story and be ready to act when He’s ready to write us into His story.  So in other words we have to wait.  We have to wait for Him to get us to the right point spiritually, emotionally, sometimes physically, mentally (and maybe some other things that end in –ally that I can’t think of right now) so that we can enter His story at the precise time, the perfect moment, that exact instance when years and years of effort and many sacrifices that came before us come together and we do the things He has called us to do.  Joseph had to wait too, but Joseph had to wait in jail because that’s where God needed him.  He had to be there, in jail, for this reason, to form a relationship with the cupbearer and baker and prison guards so at the proper time he would have the confidence of the cupbearer so that he would refer Joseph to the king so that he could interpret the kings dream about the great years then the bad years Egypt would face so that the king would trust him and make him 2nd in command and then he (Joseph) could save the food that would lead his family into Egypt and eventually into captivity so that Moses could…..and so on and on until Jesus came, conquered death, set us free from sin, gave us hope of a relationship with our Father who created it all and set it all in motion and is now the one I am trying to be patient with so that He can use me in His story. Guess what?  GOD HAS A PLAN, A GREAT PLAN.  A plan that is far greater than I am or you are.  But we have to be patient.  We have to see how God prepared all those people in the Bible for the things He had for them to do and realize we have to do the same thing.  Hopefully the place you are at while God is preparing you isn’t jail, even though sometimes it might feel like it.  Sometimes it isn’t where we want to be.  The key is that we still have to trust that God knows what He is doing and in the event that He calls us to something we love or didn’t have in mind, we still have to be ready and willing to enter the story in whatever He wants because guess what? God knows best.  We have to be patient, I have to learn more patience, as He molds and forms us into the right person for the tasks He has for us.  I still don’t really like it but I understand it.  In the end Joseph had put his trust in God and that is what I am trying to do, to wait and see what God is going to do in my life.  Probably won’t be as great as Joseph, most likely not even close, but that doesn’t matter, what matters is that I play my part in God’s story.  GOD HAS A PLAN, a great track record, a perfect story going.  Are you going to write your part or be patient and willing to act as He writes yours?

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